November 3, 2011

Role Reversal: You've Come a Long Way Girl!

Miss Lonely-hearts

Winnipeg Free Press

Wrong to expect men to 'perform' for free meal

By: Miss Lonelyhearts



DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS:

I went out with a woman on the weekend who scared me. She picked me up in her car because I don't have one, and then we went to dinner that she bought, because I don't have much money.

After dinner, it seemed she wanted payback for the fancy food. She drove me to a soccer field in her big fancy car, since she said we couldn't go to her place where she has teenagers.

We kissed a bunch and then she locked the doors, don't ask me why. She asked me if I "brought anything" and I said, "No because we don't need anything."

She said in a cold change of voice, that sounded like she meant business, "I disagree."

Then I hit the manual "unlock" and opened my side of the car and got out. I walked a long way until I could get a bus.

I just want your readers to know there are some very aggressive women out there. When I got home there was already message on my machine saying, "No loss. You're not much of a man anyways."

I am as much of a man as any other guy, and have been called a great lover in my time. But, a woman like this kills a man's desire.

 -- Having My Say, South End

Dear Having My Say:

I read your letter with great interest. I've had a handful of letters like this over the years and it's mostly to do with women with money, and definitely much more money than the guy.

It's like this woman thought you owed her the price of the dinner. Many women have seen a similar attitude from men, so you'd think they'd know how wrong it is to pressure someone for sex in exchange for dinner.

Surely we don't "work for food" in the dating world. Still, some women have the idea that a guy will welcome any sex he can get. I'd like to hear from other guys who have been expected to perform after a date, didn't want to, and how they refused it. Your letters will be published in an upcoming column.