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Young Man Surveys Wreckage of Dating Scene

January 12, 2010

youngromance.JPGby Toby Moreland

(Toby is a 24-year-old Floridian, author of "Six Bogus Beliefs of Youth" and "Caddy to the Elite" both on this site.) 

Young people searching for role models find out their parent's generation is  actually looking up to them. This provides kids with a license to abuse their sexual power and prolong their adolescence.

Divorced and disillusioned elders are quick to give their two cents about "not making the same mistakes they did."

Because they can't identify the pernicious forces destabilizing male-female relations, they are under the false impression that their life experiences have been natural.

They offer banal advice along the lines of "just love the one you're with."


"Once you get married your sex life is dead, and you don't want to waste your best years like I did."

Most middle school girls are awkward and clueless.  Then one day in high school or college, they wake up with developed bodies and start turning the heads of men of all ages.

What are they supposed to do with this new found power?  One day they feel invisible, then the next they can wear sexy clothing and act like starlets.

When so many older women are obsessed with acting young and sexy, these poor girls have no choice but to "enjoy" their youth to the hilt.

Bombarded with stories of celebrities hopping in and out of glamorous relationships, this is what they expect. Why get involved in emotionally messy relationships, when

we can all just have fun and live our own lives?

In addition, as women are taught that a career is their only assurance of security, they have to learn how to use their "natural assets" and fine-tune their sexual allure.  It is never too early to begin this education. 

In high school, an intelligent, beautiful girl offered up this request to a group of her male friends: "I just want a friend that will let me practice giving blow jobs. I wanna get really good at them." 

Obviously she saw dispensing sexual pleasure as the path to advancement. She was sixteen at the time, and certainly got her wish.

The result of this phenomenon is that teenagers and college students are masters of casual flings and short-term relationships.  They have become "strong enough" to handle them.  Such are the tricks that youth can play on us.

When you're kept busy, surrounded by friends at all times, and still physically attractive enough to regularly receive sexual attention, the future seems distant and irrelevant.

Most people snap out of this at a certain point (sometime in their 20's), but significant damage has been done to their prospects of forming healthy, permanent bonds.  They have been serving their own needs and desires for the first five or ten years of sexual activity, and they're used to it. 

"Friends with benefits" is all they know how to be; real intimacy is too serious.  The strong glue of sex that nature provides has been diluted.

Pornography has had a debilitating effect.  Another friend, who is engaged, recently confessed that he sometimes sneaks into the bathroom to masturbate after "faking it" with his fiancee.  A man faking orgasms.  He blames this habit on years of  pornography, because, in his words, "I can't stay focused on just one chick.  I'm used to jumping back and forth between fantasies in my head."

When sex is openly separated from its supreme purposes - consummation of love and procreation - restraint of sexual desire appears to be pointless.  In fact, our society hardly values restraint of any sort..

Ask any young man in the dating scene how long it takes to sleep with a girl that's interested in him.  The whole night?  Three days?  Two weeks?  No man will ever complain about this.  It is unbecoming of men to do so.

Instead, dominant young men are free of any obligations and can sleep with hundreds of beautiful women if they choose to.  Men often age more gracefully than women. While attractive girls expect to be fawned over forever and maintain their status, they are in for a disappointment.

Sure, women can stay in great shape and act young and blase for awhile, but if they allow themselves to be judged and valued as fun-loving, sexual beings, many will lose out to younger replacements, or settle for weaker men than they deserve. 

Even with the empty talk of gender equality, many young women don't know what to do if a man doesn't want sex at all times.  They've lost their own feminine value, just as the modern male intellect is stunted and malnourished.

Both young men and women are little aware of what has been taken away: The capacity for Trust, Commitment, Loyalty, and ultimately Intimacy.


Makow Comment:  "Hooking up" is what homosexuals call "cruising."  As I have said, heterosexuals are being re-engineered to behave like homosexuals in the sense of being unable to form a permanent bond with a member of the opposite sex for the purpose of procreation. The Illuminati goal is arrested development, depopulation and destabilization. Sex has become a surrogate for love, a desperate quest to salve a wound that only emotional intimacy can heal. 

Comments for "Young Man Surveys Wreckage of Dating Scene"

John said (January 14, 2010):

I read the dating scene wreckage letter. I'm about 3 times the author's age and I know that sex didn't just start. When I was young I chased many girls and many chased me. Sex was something almost all willingly performed. I was and still am an attractive man, but my friends who were not so fortunate found pleasure anyway. People get together anyway. There were physically attractive people who were lonely because they were not really nice people. Sex with all its variations and convolutions has been propelling mankind forever. Every type of sexual activity today began hundreds of thousands of years ago. People rediscover sex.

The bigger problem which you elaborate upon is related to FAMILY. I don't think sex can be blamed here as a cause a priori. Family will always be important for most humans but its strength, I think, is related more to economic matters.

I mistrust the " powers that be " also but without exotic bioengineering we are and will always be human beings. Cro Magnon man had a weak family structure and failed as H. Sapiens Sapiens arose. There is a different hard-wired inherent soul in man now that will be very difficult for the bad guys to erase.

Jason said (January 13, 2010):

I will have to agree that not many men in this country live by a code of ethics such as honor, trust, love, and respect. But I always tell women that not all men are evil deceitful sex lusting gremlins. Many are struggling to do their best not to succumb to the lies and sex oriented culture of today and that its women’s job to sift their suitors and find their a suitable mate. I’m so sick of hearing women say “Men are such pigs.” Or “Men are worthless”

I myself, when I was young and dating, picked my girlfriend, not because of her superior beauty, but because she was a young woman who was reserved, humble, and had a history of relationships, not a history of mere sexual encounters. Years later she became my wife and we have been happy since.

I write you to say that I am a member of this overall deceived young generation. My wife and I are in our mid 20s and we have a beautiful daughter together. And I want the older generations to not give up on us. People such as ourselves are overlooked by media and television and are considered “old fashioned” or uncool to today’s fads. Such as that homosexuality is the new fad and seeing pink shirts displayed in mens clothing sections in many stores. I cringe at the sheer sight of that but I believe a great catastrophe is at hand for America, whether it’s a total financial collapse or another terrorist attack. The resulting chaos will purify the masses of the immoral, political correct, godless, weak, and of the indifferent; leaving only the strong, chivalrous, honorable, and Christian Americans of my generation to rule the new day.

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at