I appreciate your perspective. I
August 8, 2004
I appreciate your perspective. I thought I was the only one who saw things this way.
Have you ever considered the root of feminism? It is the deception that young people should be able to choose their own spouses. This immediately places the female in control of the situation, and then naturally the relationship.
Men naturally pursue the 'best looking' females who then influence male behavior by choosing the 'coolest' males. The other males then emulate the 'cool' males in order to win the 'best looking' females and down the spiral we go. The woman's opinion is inherently accepted as the superior opinion in this model. This naturally translates into the marriage relationship and this is the key to the rise in feminism, IMO. All else proceeds from that initial state.
I would wager that there is far less divorce, abuse and child abandonment in a true patriarchial society where the fathers choose the spouses for their children. A caring father will do a far better job than a 'love struck' child. This also takes away the woman's 'power' of choice and reestablishes the male opinion as the naturally superior one.
Male behavior is then more influenced by righteous males than by emotionally-driven females. This also removes the superiority of the woman's opinion from the ongoing marital relationship and order is restored.
Unfortunately, this model is roundly ridiculed by taking extreme negative examples and presenting them as the norm. Just another deception foisted on the world.
Dan
I really enjoy reading your articles. It's a shame that more women don't really understand the destruction that feminisim has caused. That corrosive attitude is infecting another generation or two of girls and young women.
I see many of my friends who have sons and daughters; all they talk about is their daughters; their sons are forgotten and pushed to the side. I've seen women go through three or four sons before getting their "prized" daughter, as though they're digging through a barrel of bad apples and finally an edible one surfaces. It's a sad message for boys and young men.
L
Hi Henry,
I've found very little in your articles to disagree with, until I read your latest Managing The Male Sex Drive.
I assume from the italic quote below that you approve of, or recommend masturbation as some kind of management procedure for controlling sexual drive.
"... But, as a sensible teenage male said to me recently: "If I need to look at pictures, well then I don't really need to do it."
His focus is on managing his sex drive, not on dissipation. Thanks to masturbating every four or so days, he can be "cool" with girls".
Masturbation should be looked at from a more alchemic perspective, rather than a scientific or merely materialistic view. The 'planting of seeds' is a sacred process whether it is recognized as such or not. Planting seeds into a tissue, an anus, an intentionally sterile womb etc, is an act of self destruction. However small, a vector to that effect is initiated and if a correctional vector is not initiated, the former will have its day, albeit, if necessary generations in the future. Predisposition.
In the mean time, the masturbator tends ever increasingly towards meaninglessness and purposelessness other than hedonistic traits. Probably 99% of Western society (heterosexuals inclusive) is in a phase of mutual masturbation. This high figure has resulted from contraptions like the so called Contraceptive Pill which is actually an abortifacient, and other weird innovations like IUDs and condoms etc. It is through this process that humanity is rendered a captive, with ultimately nothing other than a dead end street facing it.
The coming US election choices, and for that matter those in Australia, signal that humanity has painted itself into a corner and has nowhere, at best a very narrow ledge, to escape. Possibly the greatest power being bestowed to evil is that arising from the flood of human sacrifices occurring in the microcosm from The Pill and from abortion. The subconscious psychic power of maternal and paternal rejection of concepti is also a contributor to the 'fire of death' , the fury of which is approaching death-chain-reaction.
The greatest bond in this dimension is that which binds the formlessness and shapelessness of ethereal reality into the substance of matter. It is this 'bond energy' which is released in the process of death and it is this which feeds evil.
Sorry dude, but i had to say this to you....
Marijonas Vilkelis
http://www.heaven-on-earth-project.com/
Excellent article as usual, Henry. The segment that resonated with me the
most was, "Let's catch ourselves when we look at women lasciviously. There
is a difference between that and admiring their sex appeal, beauty and
grace." That, to me, is a powerful statement. If we are leering at women, we
should expect to be rejected or even feared. However, we should not be
afraid to openly admire a woman - the entire woman from head to toe -
including the elusive beauty a woman can exude in her movements and facial
expressions. And last but most important, we should admire the inner beauty
that comes from her words and actions.
Plato said there are three things worth pursuing in life: truth, beauty, and
justice. I think many of us focus on truth and justice and forget about
beauty, perhaps because we feel there are more pressing issues to deal with.
An open, honest admiration of true beauty can go a long way to healing the
divide between men and women, and making us stronger in the long run against
those who corrupt our society. I plan to take more time out to appreciate
beauty in women when I see it - with healthy thoughts in mind this time.
Brian
Henry,
A textbook article! You know, I always knew it was wrong to lure or
seduce a man other than looking pretty. I was pretty, 5'4, 110 lbs.
Brown longish hair, sage green eyes , full natural lips, 34 B . I was
unconscious of my looks, but knew how to look my best. I knew not to go
too far when dating. Which wasn't much. I got married at 17. a
virgin.. I was very naive. It didn't last, but had a wonderful son.
Girls do not see guys the way they should. Down deep, they want that
Knight in shining armour. They want a soul mate. Underneath its a built
in thing. But, as you said so well, they have been robbed from the
process! Sure they attract when exposing themselves, but are so
confused and unfullfiled. Its tragic isn't it? Its part of our culture
now. I see no let up. Romance and courtship have no place. I think of
all the babies born and thrown around, I am 76 and did live in the
time before all of this sorrow. Thanks, F, Ohio
Your article as well as some readers' comments on "Managing the male sex drive" was for so good to read as a woman! At least some men around that understand how they throw their life's potential away and how they turn their back on balanced women who want to respect them and be respected.
I do understand all the compensation problem of men for their childhood traumas, but guys, wake up! You dump female value, you dump your own one as well. There are still women who are whole with beauty inside out and much creativity regarding your desires - if you could have more value inside and a vision.
Thank you Henry for the comparison of pornography with discrimination. This is actually how it feels like to a true woman and the revulsion it brings reflects completely back to the men. If they would know they are dumping themselves to be slave animals! - I still hope in more men waking up to true purity and virility...
Sue
Dr. Henry,
You have provided a great insight, once again. Regarding pornography, which
is rampant, let me relate a story which I recently told to a young
man--20 years old--as a sort of circumspect advice.
I was once a lieutenant in the wardroom (officers common room) of a
navy cruiser in port. While the Captain was ashore, the Duty Officer popped
an erotic tape into the VCR. I watched the Duty Officer, a smirking demon,
watching a few junior officers viewing the tape, and the younger ones, by so
doing, trying but failing to remain cool and aloof. I could see that the
Officer did not watch the tape; he had played it to see who would.
My offhanded message was that some of us derive pleasure in pandering to
others, and, moreover, that there are a few persons like myself--and
obviously you--who are watching them trap and enslave the weak.
Point--Be strong. Practice self control.
In either case, did I stop the tapes? No. I was too young and lacked the
courage.T
Dr. Makow,
I couldn't help it. I laughed out loud when I read the final sentence of
Managing The Male Sex Drive. The one that read: "We can resist by not allowing
ourselves to be controlled by sex."
It reminded me of a cartoon about cats who had joined an Alchoholics Anonymous type group, but in this case, the cats were swearing off their cruel habit of chasing after and devouring mice....
I would agree that we shouldn't be fornicating like dogs, but I think that there is
definitely a link between inner and outer attractiveness. ...A woman that looks like a goddess usually does so because in many ways, she is one, in my humble opinion. To find her appealing is no sin.
But go, if you must, go back to your chess tournaments (or whatever) and
uh, heh heh, good luck!
Bob
Hello Mr. Makow!
Well it's finally nice to speak with you, albeit informally via email. I truly enjoyed this piece on the Male Sex Drive. I only wish that someone would have thrown this article smack into my face when I was about 14 years old! Perhaps they should have glued it to my forehead.
Fortunately I have a son that is 16 years of age to pass this information on to. We live in a rather quaint town in Southern Ontario where although deviant sex certainly abounds, he has yet to find much interest in that type of imagery. But tonight when he gets home, there is going to be an interesting article laying there on his pillow....
There is not much that the two of us do not discuss. Adam and I have what I consider to be a very special relationship. I don't know how or why, but God certainly has blessed my family with a fabulous group of people that share love, compassion and a great deal of just plain ol' common sense.
Thank you very much for posting this article. I think that many people are going to be printing and laying your message on many beds tonight to say words that parents are just too afraid to discuss with their children.
All the best,
Richard Dear Henry,
Your latest entry is wonderful, if only us men knew this fact when we were younger, our society would be a whole lot better than it is now.
I believe that Pornography (in any form) Whether it is political as in "swastika type graphitti", or those Hard-core videos which sell everyday is degrading to everyone involved...the two types of victims to be enslaved are the "models" and the young male consumers.
In the [Communist] "Dusseldorf Papers" found in Germany in 1919, one of the platforms stated to "Destroy men's Ruggedness by Sports and sexy pictures"
We have to think in order to free ourselves from the cruel slavery of the One Worlders, who treat us like mindless animals.
Thank you for writing this,
Sincererly Yours,
James
very good article, Henry!
i'm just in a period - since i split with my gf - of trying to control my
sex urge (and not be controlled by it), and it's not easy; but i'm not
giving up!
your article is another inspiration, thank you!
keep up!
B
Amsterdam
Hi Henry,
Great article! I have some comments to share.
Now that I am in my 30's, I can look back on my younger
years with the perspective only gained through experience,
time and increased knowledge.
If I only knew 15 years ago that We are all unwitting
players in an illuminati 'gilded cage' theatre.
There came a point in time where I thought about and tried
to remember the women who'd agreed to share a bed with me. I
was not able to without some effort ...I did not have that many partners compared to some.
It was at this point that the inability to recall signified
a problem. Not that my memory was any worse, it is just that
the experiences shared with these women were now diminished
in my mind because I couldn't remember them as individuals.
Riding my bike for the first time more is more clear in my
mind than some involvements with these women of the past. I
had to ask myself what I was doing.
I know a guy who has slept with over 300 women and he is my
age. He is Joe Average in appearance. He isn't rich or well
off. I think of all the time, effort and energy this fellow
must put in with attempts at getting women laid.
Maybe at some point in the past I may have admired his
'accomplishment', but now I almost feel sad for him.
Do I want to be a 'lite' version of this guy???
Looking at the big picture, physical unification between men
and women should take place in the form of man & wife.
God created man and woman as sexual creatures with sex as
pleasurable. We can't go forth and multiply without sex. But
God also created the institute of marriage in which to
exercise mens and womens sexuality.
One chapter in a very popular book on success called "Think
and Grow Rich", devotes a chapter to the 'transmutation' of
sexual energy. Let me quote from the
book -
"So strong and impelling is the desire for sexual contact
that men freely run the risk of life and reputation to
indulge it. When harnessed, and redirected along other
lines, this motivating force maintains all of its attributes
of keenness of imagination, courage etc., which may be used as
powerful creative forces in literature, art or in any other
profession or calling..."
In our easy credit, drive-thru culture we have been suckered
into the role as whiney children demanding instant
satisfaction and gratification. Patience is a sin in our
modern societal religion.
These illuminists think objectively over the very long term.
How about Mankind? We should let our actions speak for our
words.
C
As usual, Henry, a great article about "managing the sex drive" and "right on".
The last phrase was "slavery begins in the mind". For clarity... "(sexual) slavery begins in the mind".....as fantasy.
Our world is set up to feed our fantasies, then exploit them, as are many women. Our buying patterns are exploited by fantasies, mostly sexual and sometimes by subtle sexual innuendo.
I once belonged to a men's group that over time learned to be quite honest and open (frank). After one meeting, we all decided to go out for a snack. Possibilities were discussed, and I was fascinated and actually relieved when one very popular nearby restaurant/grill was rejected because of the low cut blouses and short short skirts the young beautiful waitresses wore. Very, very tempting! Someone wisely said "He didn't want to have to deal with the temptation".
Few guys realize that their need to look at females in a lascivious way is really a symptom that they are weaker than the female they are oogleing, fantisizing about, and desiring. The female form is a powerful hypnotic device. A hypnotic device attracts, focuses, then gains control of attention. Many women learn early on how to attract attention and with the guile inherited from "Eve", gain control to get what they want.
I've been there and done that, but over time I have realized that sex isn't the "be all, and end all" that I was led to believe, and expected in my teens. Sex has a price, as does everything else. Few of us, males or females, realize the price we ultimately pay for our fantasies, sexual and otherwise. The price a young girl pays for her fantasies about the "prince charming" down the block often leads to great disappointment, days, weeks or years later.
It's been said by some psychologists that "sex begins in the mind". Our sex drives are usually driven by our sexual fantasies, and we are encouraged by our media, including advertising, to have sexual fantasies. If we don't want to be controlled by sex or sexual desire, we must learn to drop the fantasies.
Very little masturbation is initiated without a sexual fantasy. Drop the fantasy, or magazine, or video promoting the mental imagery, and the need for masturbation will be most likely be sublimated. Couples often use X rated videos as a stimulation for fantasy that then leads to sex. It's a false turn on! It's a symptom of personal and spiritual emptiness, a "hole in the soul".
The false "turn on" of sexual fantasies ultimately disappoint and too often get us into trouble. The wide use of Viagra, even among 30ish males, is a symptom that the sex wasn't as good as the fantasies and the aid of a drug is needed to enhance it. In older men, it's a symptom that they haven't grown beyond their teenage fantasies or fear of failure.
I personally view Hugh Heffner of "Playboy" fame, now in his mid to late seventies, still needing to be surrounded by vacuous young blonde bimbos, bragging about his use of Viagra, as a pathetic and empty human being. Rather than a cultural icon, he's been a failure at marriage and a failure as a father. He, in my eyes at least, failed in manhood. All image, no substance! How many of us bought into his empty world view based on sexual fantasy?
B
