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Thanks to My Wife, I Looked Death in the Eye

January 7, 2016

paul_by_purple_ephemerality-d40dmhg.jpgI turned 66 last November. After 
a shipwreck of a life, I am cast up 
on the shore of old age. 

My wife is a vicarious hypochondriac; she imagines I'm sick. 

All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages.

William Shakespeare

Seeing Death in a Positive Light 
(Revised from March 2015)
By Henry Makow Ph.D

After a friend died prematurely last year, my wife insisted I get an electrocardiogram (EKG.)  

My wife is a vicarious hypochondriac; she imagines I'm sick. 

Her autobiography would be called, "The Way of the Worrier."  She listens to "Doctor Radio." The Canadian Diabetes Association is on her Twitter feed. 

I am psychosomatic. This is a bad combination.  

After the EKG, I felt slight aches in the heart area for over a week. Like most people, I am naturally suited to a life of ease. Always in excellent health, any physical discomfort alarms me. 

In a bake shop, I felt the aches and had to sit down. A kindly young woman asked me if I was alright. I felt like an old codger, which I guess I am becoming, even though my self-image is still a precocious young man. 

Thanks to my wife, I thought I was going to die. I even made a Will, (because my friend stupidly failed to make one.) I started to contemplate death. (BTW, the psychosomatic period ended. I am completely fine now! Thank God. Health is the only thing we can't replace.) 


When we are young, old age and death are far away concerns. We are too busy forging our way. We behave as though we're going to live forever. 

As we pass 65, we notice that people our age are dying! I check obituaries to see how long each person lived and measure off how much time i might have left.

The Wheel of Time has moved like the changing seasons. The celebrities I admired are silent or gone. The starlets I adored are shrivelled and old. I watch old movies and think- "all these people are dead!"  We are surrounded by ghosts: all the people who came before us.  

I feel nostalgic. Every generation thinks the world is becoming a worse place. This is because it is. (Civilization is in severe decline, for the reasons I discuss on this site.) 

Gradually my life is taking a retrospective slant. But it's not necessarily bad. Instead of acting like I will live forever, I am starting to see life as it really is, ephemeral, i.e. temporary and fleeting.

I am going to die. We all are. 

Seeing life as ephemeral helps me live in the moment. It helps me to not take things so seriously. It makes me humble. I also have more compassion for my fellow human beings. I imagine their last moments. We all share a common condition. We didn't ask to be born. We try to make sense of it, make the most of it, despite obstacles put in our path by the satanic cult that controls society. 


During the week of my "heart ache," I tried to come to terms with Death: 

"We" are a Divine Spark housed in the body of an ape. That ape has a certain lifespan. When it ends, "we" disappear.  But who's to say that's a bad thing?

We measure everything in terms of our material dimension.  But the material dimension is holding us back. The collective obsession with money, sex and creature comforts enchains the soul. Perhaps death is liberation. Perhaps  the real party is happening somewhere else and our "life" is a pale imitation of the real thing.

fancy-restaurant.jpgIf we went to a popular restaurant, we wouldn't dream of keeping our table forever. We would enjoy our dinner and leave. This way someone else can do the same thing.

The same applies to life. We take up space. We take up jobs, houses, food. We take up psychological space too. We demand respect, admiration, love. Clap. Clap. Clap.

You get the picture. We must vacate so new souls in new bodies can manifest themselves. This is how life renews itself. We need to identify with the process rather than our  personal existence.

Imagine if no one aged and died! We'd be rubbing shoulders with Genghis Khan's soldiers! We'd have to listen to Sonny and Cher, and Madonna forever. Nixon and LBJ would keep running for President. After our turn, we must leave the stage.

We're always harping about equality.  Aging and death are the only truly equal things in life. No matter how rich or poor, smart or stupid, we all age at the same rate and die. It's true some live longer, but the result is still the same.

This is particularly gratifying when I think of the Illuminati. They cannot save themselves. These bus are going to die and no matter what the media says about how wonderful they were, we'll be cheering. Their deaths will be a blessing. You know whom I am thinking of.

Death is nature's way of cleansing mankind and making a fresh start.

left, Claus Von Stauffenberg placed bomb in conference bunker.)  claus1.jpg

We do cling to life tenaciously. Death makes cowards of us all. For example, many intelligent Germans recognized that Hitler would bring Germany to ruin and kill millions, yet not one was willing to sacrifice his own life to dispatch the miscreant with a bullet. So instead, when the bomb failed to do the job, hundreds of righteous conspirators died on meat hooks or by firing squads.

If we realized that we're going to die anyway, perhaps we wouldn't cling to life. We might show more courage. The man who dispatched Hitler would have achieved immortality.

Finally, everyone has a mission. I am doing what I always felt destined to do: write the truth. 
Ultimately, the best preparation for death is the knowledge that we fulfilled God's purpose for us. We can meet our Maker with our head held high. 


First Comment by Tony B:

For me life is a little deeper.  

As a young man with three young sons, I moved us to Laguna Beach, CA on the behest of "Mady" de Shismareff so that we could more easily work together as the "California League of Christian Parents," our tiny media outlet, since this was her home.

One Sunday a very beautiful young woman I had known before moving came to visit.  I took her, my sons and the family dog on a drive over Laguna Beach's back trails to show her the beauty of the place.  But the trail suddenly ended as a washout with about a 200 foot drop and we were all out in the air when I spotted the trail continuation to the right on what was left of that hill.  The girl was screaming and had thrown herself on me but, in this instant that took much less time than reading these words, I threw her off and automatically crammed the wheel to the right.  That International Scout turned 90 degrees in midair and softly landed on the continued trail.

I was stunned and not sure of this apparent reality but the girl proved it to be true because she began screaming at me, calling me the devil, etc., all the way home.  She immediately left to never come back.  

Although I could call this nothing but a miracle, which I had more or less dismissed up to that time, I still managed in a short time to put it out of my mind.  Probably out of fear, I'm not sure.  

But in my latter years I realize I was given an extension on earth for some reason.  Or perhaps one or more of my sons or even the girl were given that extension for a reason and I was just there as the vehicle.  Whatever its purpose, this event was outside the laws of physics as we understand them and into the realm of the supernatural.  Believe me, such an experience changes how one looks upon life.  It becomes impossible to dismiss the invisible supernatural world as someone's fantasy.  Suddenly the tenets of true Christianity become obviously real, absolutely logical, much more so than one totally immersed in materialism wants to admit.  

But how do you refute such a thing?  It is God yelling into your ear, "I am real."  Suddenly you understand that the material world we see and touch is the illusion, the real world is the invisible one we know only by faith before our worldly death.

As my now traditional Catholic twins remind me, this story is not so rare, miracles happen constantly, today as well as in the past, they are just officially ignored in the materialistic, especially English speaking, Protestant world.


Comments for "Thanks to My Wife, I Looked Death in the Eye"

Marcos said (January 9, 2016):

A Christian perspective on the article "I Looked Death in the Eye", if I may:

- There is nothing good about death. Death involves corruption of the body, sadness and separation. Life is good, our problem is that we live life in fallen world corrupted by sin. Our hope remains in the promise that God will conquer death forever eventually.

- Our body of an ape is wonderfully made, and just as real as our souls. Again, the problem is that it functions in a fallen world. In fact, not many people realize that Christianity teaches that we will have bodies in Heaven, albeit immortal and incorruptible ones.

- Our bodies shelter a soul, not a divine spark. Things can be made by God and not be divine. A soul can be bad, if corrupted by sin.

- Gnosticism concepts, as presented in the article, are dangerous because they teach that we are little gods and that the material world is inherently bad. This creates a false hope that eventually, when the material jail cage is gone, we all are going to be OK without repentance and faith. It will only take some time.

The hope of the Christian is different: the soul forgiven by faith in Jesus will eventually inhabit a new perfect body to enjoy the presence of a Holy God forever.

Dan said (January 8, 2016):

Glad to hear of your recent recovery, Henry! Seriously though, I'm glad you had a heart checkup. Between November and December two people I knew dropped dead with heart attacks. Neither of them or their doctors hadn't known they had advanced heart trouble because it requires expensive tests to find out.

I know several men over 60 who have had stints installed, but every one of them didn't know they had a blocked artery before they ended up in the emergency room. So once again, it's worth having a EKG.
If you really want to be absolutely certain, it's worth having a Cardiac Characterization exam, and an Echogram.

Due to the sudden deaths of two acquaintances in as many months last year I also developed a case of hypochondria. Not for myself, but for friends. On the evidence it's better to checkup. When heart disease discovered in advance, doctors can solve the problem before it happens.

Kevin D said (January 7, 2016):

My comment is: The German General who carried out the assassination plot you mention, was not really cowardly. There is a book titled "Holding the Stirrup" by one of the few remaining family members of the assassination plotters who were Old Rite German aristocracy, Baroness Elisabeth von Guttenberg.

Bottom line of the book: the plot was well planned, well executed, the bomb placed in an attache case next to Hitler, an unexpected call occurred, the plotter left the room unexpectedly, Hitler moved his seat away from the case for some unexplained reason (prompting of demons?), bomb went off, Hitler was only wounded. Almost the entire family wound up on meat hooks.

Interesting book. Glimpses of the Old Rite Catholic Germany the Illuminati/mason cabal were determined to eliminate.

Angela said (January 7, 2016):

Real Catholics always pray for the grace of a happy death!

Colm said (January 7, 2016):

A remarkably poignant and reflective piece. You're bang on about the eerie feeling watching dead stars on TV from one's youth conjures up. Last Summer I watched a repeat episode of the not very good Seventies British sit-com Are You Being Served?. Every actor and actress who featured was dead at the time I watched it, apart from the guy who played Mr Rumbold. He died a few weeks ago. A few days after Christmas two pop stars from my youth, Lemmy from Motorhead, and the drummer of the Ska band, the Specials, died - on the same day. Such folk represented youthful rebellion (however spurious and manufactured) for teenagers in the late 1970s. Hearing that they'd both died in early old age brought to mind Auden's remark about death resembling the distant sound of thunder at a picnic.

Chestsy said (March 6, 2015):

In grade school, the nuns used to say to me: "Wake up and die right!"

Funny how to me that sums it up. The reason I'm still alive is b/c God is giving me another chance. Life is a beautiful thing but can be very hard. We do the best we can with His help.
Perhaps the Germans didn't kill Hitler b/c they believed God is the Master of Life and Death. After all, we are taught to decry suicide bombers, but we should more pity them. Their actions are actions of those without any hope.
Do the ends justify the means (Scruples question?)?

Ken Adachi said (March 6, 2015):

Many years ago, Don Amiche starred in a movie called "Things Change" which illustrated an axiom of life: New and unexpected events occur all the time in this world which can completely turn dire plans upside down on its head and we wind up with a much better situation than we thought would unfold. Some people describe such unexpected turns of fortune as miracles, as there is a divine element always at work, but the most determinant factor is how things pan out is our thoughts and attitudes. That's because reality is a by product of our collective THOUGHTS. Change your thoughts, and you change your individual and our collective reality, including how long you live. We often see videos from Japanese TV that show people in their late 90s carrying on their life as if they were 45 years old. They don't have time to get old and feeble. They're too busy doing their work, either at home or at the office, and enjoying the thrill of participation in life. The common denominator? They're having FUN.

Steve said (March 6, 2015):

The only people who will meet God with their heads held high will be the Satanists. Anyone who is a child of God will meet him with great fear and trembling...If you think that you have done anything here on Earth that will impress God then you don't know God.

CW said (March 6, 2015):

No way..the Illuminati intend to live forever..through AI. They intend to upload their minds to Robotic life..clones of themselves to rule the world forever.. google RAy Kurzweil or United Therapeutics Martina Rothblatt the
leader and Transgender,transhuman.. future of the Elite...

WB said (March 5, 2015):

First Comment from WB:

You NAILED IT with your article on death today. You did not miss a single salient point. I have come to all the same conclusions you so artfully expressed myself.

Even so, I still continue to doubt my courage in death. Your illustration of the failure to rid the world of Hitler was spot on. I feel an obligation to God and my forefathers to stand up and die for the freedoms God has given us in this once great Nation. To resist all tyranny.

But I know that it will be only with His help that I will muster the courage to die well and meet my maker with my head held high. May the God of all grace and mercy give courage to all who feel the same obligation that I feel.

God bless you Henry. I look forward to meeting you in the hereafter.

Magda said (March 5, 2015):

We are ultimately supposed to be expending our energy on living for a higher purpose. Our purpose is weighty and eternal. Moreover, our actions, sayings and stances will have ramifications beyond this present realm.

"For indeed, it is not eyes that are blinded, but blinded are the hearts which are within the breasts." - Quran (22:46)

Bob A said (March 5, 2015):

Just turned 64 myself, and I can appreciate your article. I love your comparison to a fine restaurant. I'll use it.

While I was being feted by my kids I couldn't help calling to mind a beautiful surah of the Qur'an, appropriately called Time (#103).

Translations are never adequate but here goes.

"I swear by time,
Most surely man is in loss
Except those who have faith and do good works,
Who enjoin the truth on each other
And who enjoin patience on each other"

That's it short and sweet. Let's keep looking for the Truth.

Rick said (March 5, 2015):

I liked the newest article Seeing Death in a Positive Light. Death is just a continuation of life. Life is eternal. Death is just a transformation into a better form of it. The point of this life is to secure an place in eternity with God. Like The real-estate people always say Location Location Location.

Dave M said (March 5, 2015):

Having an operational existence in this "reality" driven by technology and physics, my "character" has come to the conclusion (through both physical and thought experiment) that this construct all around us, is not reality. It is no more real or with absolute form than smoke in the wind, and free will, another mere illusion since actors generally follow scripts. As far as I am concerned, this is a virtual reality, whether it is actually solid and our bodies are complex data acquisition and control systems or if all this we see, touch, smell, etc. is based on neural manipulation, is anyone's guess. But it isn't real. I believe we are someplace else and whether we are tethered by some unknown technology to these meat puppets/avatars we inhabit for a short time, or we are chemical/electronically manipulated, I am not sure. I myself, tend to go with tethered to our "minds" (souls if you like) someplace else.

I look at this virtual reality like a ride and there are lots of them, they can be short or long, dramatic or boring, enlightening or terrifying. They can all be different in their own ways or the same. You get on the ride (you're born), you travel the twists and turns (you live) and when the ride is over, you get off (die). Some people are scared to death getting on and riding a roller coaster, but they know that when the ride is over, even though they may have experienced transient fear or thrills or panic, it's still back to good 'ole, what we deem reality. So can getting off the ride really be that bad?

You can't stay on the same ride forever, other minds are waiting, but certainly during civilization for the last 7000 years, there were probably 10 billion rides to try. I like the concept of Andy Weir's "The Egg" making us all the same mind, simply observing life through every character that ever "existed" in this virtual reality. Possibly a virtual reality which acts as a nurturing/learning environment for the we, the "unborn." Maybe life is simply entertainment, escapism for a technologically advanced humans, maybe some form of advanced learning system. Or maybe "life" is a prison, a mind locked into materialism and the gatekeepers of this reality, the screws, are what we so "lovingly" call the illuminati.

One event that might be interesting, is that if this "reality" is constructed and supported both by interference pattern and consciousness, should a majority of the "characters" somehow realize that they are characters at the same "time," consciousness en-masse could look back on itself and by simple observation and examination/analysis most probably would collapse the wave-function that is this "reality."

Just some thoughts from another actor in this construct we deem real ;-)

mary said (March 5, 2015):

Great article today Henry!'s not a party here on Earth...I turned 50 last year myself and immediately became enlightened after asking God for help and enlightenment as to why our world is the way it is. I found your wonderful website too....thank you and God bless you for what you do....let's keep up the good fight!

Adam said (March 5, 2015):

I love your website and your effort to spread God's sweet Truth.

As you say brother man, death is only the beginning to the next journey for the souls of the good and godly have a free pass to go where ever they please after leaving the physical form. But not yet.

I hope you stay with us for a long time. We are about to witness the fall of the dark ones who have been ruling this planet for a long time now.

The brothers are waking up around the world and soon, the false kings and prophets will be running for cover and beginning for mercy and forgiveness.

Keep up the good work.

I am 47 but I eat well and exercise...feel and function like 17.

Hope to have you around till at least 2050 ;)

Blessed be the eternal Brotherhood of Truth, the real Guardians of this beautiful Galaxy.

Much Love,
Your humble brother in God, Adam.

Larry said (March 5, 2015):

Greetings, Henry!

Alex Jones claims the Illuminati intend to meld man and machine so that they can live indefinitely while we schlubs continue to live and die as we serve them. He thinks the Illuminati take this "Ye are gods." business seriously.

Of course, Alex always had a flair for the melodramatic. We've been subjected to his rants here in Austin for almost twenty years.

Meanwhile, at 65, you've still got a few good years left. I turned 70 last month and just got my first Social Security check. I decided to gamble that I would live long enough to make it the most economically viable thing to do.

So far, so good.

J said (March 5, 2015):
The Washington Post of July 16, 1932 included the following English translation of a passage that appeared originally in the French newspaper La Liberté. The French paper was unhappy with statements made by the American President Herbert Hoover: 6

"Does this government, which obeys gangsters, which capitulates helplessly before thieves and assassins of babies in the cradle, dare to assume such a height of moral authority that it thinks it can dictate to Europe and France?

Americans are the only race which passed directly from barbarism to decadence without knowing civilization."



But I hope my intent got through


JG said (March 5, 2015):

I'm personally experiencing critical health problems at age 61. I've learned so much these last 5 weeks since my health has been restricted.

I've learned that God has been in control more than I ever thought and that only the grace of Jesus Christ can cleanse you from your past sins.
I've also learned who shows love and charity, and also, the ones who no longer want to know you once you're ill as if you have been cursed.

In the end all we have is the fate of God that can only be reconciled through Jesus Christ.

JJ said (March 5, 2015):

Yes, the Illuminati shits kick off in the end. "It" never dies, unfortunately, but they do, individually, and good riddance to each and every one of them. God will deal with them in the end, and the truth is, He deals with them now, but nothing like what awaits them after their second death. And they KNOW this.

The members of my Illuminati family are starting to age, and it's gratifying to watch them furtively try to pack every bit of temporal worldly pleasure and activity into each little moment they have left, pushing themselves to the limit without rest, knowing this world is all they have, and the deal they made specifies that they only get what they want in this one. It will be over soon.

It's fun to watch. God is good!

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at