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The Struggle to Be Human: Evelyn's Witness

January 3, 2021

Evelyn, a 74-year old woman who lives alone on a farm with 6 dogs, 6 horses, and a miniature mule, feels God's presence constantly. She writes:

"I try to have a kind word to everyone whom I meet, accompanied by a smile.  
There are so many lonely folks out there who have no one to tell their problems or joys.  
Now, when I go to town I have so many hugs that I get a week's worth in one day! "

from 23/9/2018
by Evelyn

Oh my goodness!  I am going to have to stop reading your website because I cannot subdue the urge to respond again.  Concerning MA's response to The Struggle to Stay Human, I counted his using the first person singular pronoun at least 35 times.  It sounds as though all of his efforts were for his own good. 

 A relationship with God Almighty/Jesus Christ...if it is the real thing...should NEVER be about what you can get out of it!  I am 74-years-old as of last week.  Jesus came into my heart at the age of nine.  I am so sorry to admit that my life was not always a saintly one.  I had the audacity to rebel against Him in my young adult life, because I hated the circumstances in which I found myself.  

If I had been God, I would have struck me down with a lightning bolt; but He patiently waited on me to pitch my temper tantrums and finally arrive at the very bottom of the pit.  And, like the prodigal son when he 'came to himself', my Heavenly Father lovingly lifted me out.  After much thought about the matter, I can honestly say that even if there is nothing after this life here on earth (which I do not believe), I would have rather lived it His way.
[If you get tired of reading this epistle, push the delete button; but God has laid you on my heart, and I feel so compelled to share Him with you.  You seem like a very honest, dear man who has given so much to others.] 
May I share with you, my witness?

After 23 years of marriage, my husband left me almost four years ago.  I live on a 26-acre farm with my six dogs, six remaining horses, and a miniature mule.  My daughter, son-in-law, and two grandsons live 15 miles away.  They come as much as they can to help.  I only go to the city once a week to do all of my errands. Sometimes, I go as many as six days with no human interaction except for a phone call here and there. 

 I must confess that I really miss hugs.  However,  I am NEVER alone.  I feel God's presence constantly.  My prayer list is fairly long, containing names of folks I heard about online or in the news, or have met in the stores.  My prayer life consists of talking to the Lord all day long just as if I could actually see Him.  I must wear out His ears!

On Fridays, prior to leaving home, I ask for Him to fill me up so much with Himself that He just explodes onto those with whom I encounter during the day.  I realize that to many I may be the only person who gives them a smile or a word of encouragement that day.  I try to have a kind word to everyone whom I meet, accompanied by a smile.  There are so many lonely folks out there who have no one to tell their problems or joys.  

Now, when I go to town I have so many hugs that I get a week's worth in one day!  And the one thing I always tell each one of them is that I will be praying for them.  To my surprise, even non-Christians seem so appreciative to hear that.  And I go home that evening so comforted by others who have responded to me through His love touching them.
I am far from rich on worldly terms, but I can honestly say that each and every need is always met...sometimes in the form of a miracle....these are the most exciting.  Joshua told the children of Israel to make a stack of stones after they crossed Jordan River.  Whenever their kids asked them what the stones represented, the parents were to tell them of all that God had miraculously done.  My stack of stones must be higher than the Empire State Bldg., and each one is such a precious memory of a loving Heavenly Father. 
I just felt so sorry for whoever is M.A.  His last sentence just broke my heart. ["Ultimately, my struggle is that my spirit died and I have no ambition or ability to revive it and rise to a higher plane again."] 

But to you both, I want to say that God did not mean for your lives to be a struggle.  Jesus told us that He came for us to have life and to have it more abundantly.  On the other hand, He also said that life would not be a bowl of cherries.  We would have our share of struggles and trials, but He promised that He would never put on us more than we could bare.  I believe that last promise is possible because we are not to bare it in our own strength.  His strength and power can shine through our weaknesses. 
I will do my best to let this be my last email.  Wishing you and yours a wonderful weekend.


Scruples - the game of moral dillemas

Comments for "The Struggle to Be Human: Evelyn's Witness"

anon said (September 24, 2018):

Concerning the article-The struggle to stay human. I am a RN. I get the feeling these days that some humans aren’t humans at all.

Not speaking about burnt out humans like M.A. I do pediatric cases in homes. Some of these young children...demonically possessed? They laugh as they try to inflict pain on me by pinching, biting, kicking while laughing. They have an abnormal strength and today one pinched me hard enough to rip the skin off my arm! Then they start a dramatic fake crying when a parent rushes to the child. They are so abnormal to me. I feel this strongly. I see in their eyes it was purposeful behavior. Their parents don’t have a clue. Vaccinations? I don’t know the answer. I do know that children were not like this before.

To protect my humanity, I live a reclusive life in Alaska and limit time on the internet and TV. I set boundaries with people and have had to let some friends and family members go because of such negative and selfish behaviors. Behaviors that appear to be unveiled somehow. I never saw it before. I feel people like me are being culled out by a variety of measures. God is my only protection these days.

Christine said (September 24, 2018):

I just wanted to say thanks for your latest article. Last night I cried myself to sleep, begging Jesus to help me hang on until He returns. Your words were exactly what I needed to read today.

It has been 28 years since I pledged to follow Jesus and live a life of service to others. My life was fairly easy before I changed, but I can honestly say now, the last 28 years have been hell. I feel exhausted and I have lost the motivation to keep struggling. I thought things were so bad in 1990, I gave it eight years at the most until Jesus returned. It's a blessing that I did not know at the time I would still be struggling to hang on 28 years later. In 1990, I could not imagine the dystopian nightmare the world would feel like in 2018. I have no idea if any of my efforts over the past 28 years have changed anything. Thanks for your article, and the comments. It helps to know I am not alone in my feelings.

Malcolm F said (September 23, 2018):

Verse 2 is Paul’s answer to how we turn all of life into worship. We must be transformed. We must be transformed. Not just our external behavior, but the way we feel and think — our minds. Verse 2: “Be transformed by the renewal of your mind.”

I look forward to meeting and chatting with Evelyn at the wedding feast!

Anonymous said (September 23, 2018):

Great article Henry!

Far more of us Christians need to spend much more time in the presence of God. A great little book along these lines of prayer and the cross is "Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ" by Jeanne Guyon. It has an excellent anointing on it which is very rare nowadays in this ungodly generation.

Mike Stone said (September 23, 2018):

Beautiful essay by Evelyn! It warmed my heart and changed my whole outlook for the day.

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at