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American Celbrates Life ... in Romania

February 12, 2010

Bistrita-Jud-1.jpgby Kevin

I was born in Los Angeles and lived the typical southern California suburban life of isolation. Being a child from divorced parents, I learned early on what America meant. Something always bothered me about the society in which I lived and where as when I was younger I couldn't quite define it, as I grew older it became more and more clear that modern American Society had an overlaying artificialness to it.  I got the impression that I was living in some kind of experiment and that everything was temporary in nature and not intended to be lasting like the civilizations of the past.

I remember how I loved to watch Little House on the Prairie and feeling such an attraction to that family.  I wondered why it was so different from what were claimed to be families all around me.  Almost all kids at school came from divorced families and many were also victims of abuse. It seemed that most women with which I came into contact with growing up in America were hostile and belligerent and Southern California was probably the capital of alternative lifestyles and divorce and the traditional family life was viewed as the enemy.  My only contact with traditional family values as a child growing up in America was again, Little House on the Prairie. 

Observing these traits in society, I naturally began to associate America with them.  America to me meant, divorce, abuse, fighting, neglect and above all, isolation. In fact, as I got older, I came to notice that the situation was more like a lack of society rather than a bad society.  What do I mean?  Well, first of all, there was no contact between people.  There was no walking in the streets and no open markets and stores.  People simply entered their cars from the garage attached to their house, opened the garage door and drove to the store or work and never came into contact with another human being.  Where was society?  What is the definition of society?  I detected something very wrong with America and the endless uniformity and dullness of Southern Californian suburbs seemed to be the chief example of this fact. No matter how many times we visited the same grocery store, the employees there never would recognize us.  Years would go by without a single word being exchange with a neighbor. My female teachers hated my mother.  Even my cub scout troop was dissolved because one of the mothers sued after a fall in the snow on our first field trip. Every little girl who lived on my street was sexually abused and their stories horrified me.  Between experiencing these things I also got to enjoy the constant fighting between my parents over child support checks and who's turn it was keep me on the week end.  O how I longed for Little House on the Prairie where everybody worked together, went to church together and helped and supported each other through hardships, harvests and barn raising.  This was the America I thought must have been just an invented myth. 

Due to my mother's line of work, I was exposed to many emigrants from a wide variety of places such as Iran, Turkey, Armenia, Poland, Romania, Croatia, Argentina, Vietnam and India.  There was something special about these people and I noticed it even as a child.  What was it about them that attracted me?  Why did they seem to be so content and hardworking? They seemed to benefit from a force or energy that I could see was totally lacking in the society in which I lived.  What was it?  The answer was FAMILY in the traditional sense.  Though they were living in America like me, they had transferred their sense of family and society from their country and were still enjoying the benefits while being surrounded by the social misery.  Somehow they lived unscathed in pockets of healthy family lives they themselves emitted.  For me, happiness was being around these people and I would enjoy pretending that I was a part of their family as well.  I would learn everything I could about their countries, cultures and foods and they would be so pleased to see my interest.  The highlight of my childhood was when my mother would be invited to one of their homes for one of their holidays and I'd get to bask in the light of family life such as being seated at the dinner table together and listening to people actually talking to each other relating stories and experiences of the old country.  I could see that the hardships and poverty they went through actually strengthened them and was the source of their great work ethic and family values. 

I remember one girl from Romania who worked with my mother.  She had swam across the Danube to escape from communism and tyranny and somehow made it to America.  She came with just the shirt on her back and immediately started working with house cleaning and taking night classes in English.  Her strong faith in God and her exceptional morals and ethics allowed her to flourish and reap the benefit of the opportunities in America.  The same opportunities that Americans seemed to be unable to benefit from.  Could a lack of traditional family values and morals be a factor? Why was it that emigrants always seemed to find success while native born Americans drowned in debt and misery?

She worked hard and worked her way up to becoming a manager.  Eventually she got a degree and opened her own business.  Only after years of work and after the fall of communism did she go back to Romania and get married to a Romanian man then returned. 

Seeing her wonderful value as a beautiful, feminine and traditional women, I fell in love with Romania and wanted to get to know as much as possible about this country.  Something about modern American women repulsed me and I absolutely refused to have a girlfriend or anything to do with them while in high school. Based on my experience as child growing up in America, I could not separate divorce with the American women.  The two things seemed to go hand in hand.  I remember making the concrete decision as a teenager that I would never marry a girl from a divorced family and that I had to marry a foreign girl no matter what.  I started corresponding with girls as pen pals from Romania, Bulgaria, Lithuania and Russia.  There were no proms, dances or parties for me.  I was attracted to everything that was traditional, religious and moral.  Though it was sometimes lonely, I knew I was holding out for something of value and meaning. One girl in Romania particularly caught my attention by her femininity, shyness and goodness and we wrote to each other for two years.  After two years of junior college, I decided to go to Romania to meet her in person and she was everything I imagined. We were married after spending six months as a guest of her family. I was 20 and she was 18 and we were both virgins.  Sixteen years later, we're still married and have a beautiful family. 

We did eventually come back to America where she, independently of my own opinion, noticed the same flaws in American society as I.  She didn't like it and couldn't quite adjust to it.  Living several years in California refusing to go into debt and fall into the "American Trap", we lived very simply but never flourished. As I grew in knowledge and understanding, I could see the writing on the wall that the American system was not sustainable.  I could see that economic collapse was inevitable and soon all the debt, credit cards, stock market casinos, leases, and housing speculation would all come crashing down.  The wars pretty much sealed the fate of America and I knew that we could not continue to be a part of it and incur the consequences of a system we never supported. I did not want my children growing up in such a system nor did I want them to reap what American foreign policy would shortly bring to the homeland.  I could just sense that something dark was coming and on August 11, 2001 we moved to Romania. 

We bought a beautiful apartment in downtown Bucharest for $19,000, bought a used car for $300 and a fertile piece of land with a peasant house fifty kilometers outside of Bucharest for $15,000 and now live completely debt free. How many Americans live debt free? The taxes on our house is about $30!!  In the city we live in a normal urban setting where there is contact with other people in the streets, the markets and the people in stores know us personally and greet us.  We're on friendly terms with our neighbors and visit each other. We have very efficient public transportation in the form of subways, trams and buses. We have our children's school right next door and have one of the biggest public parks and youth centers within walking distance. The Christian religion is taught in the public schools and our children are taken to church for communion. A priest comes to teach them about morals and ethics.  There is even a civics class where the children learn the value of honesty, altruism, helping the needy, forgiveness and overall good social ethics.  I can detect no dark or perverse agendas being forced on our children and being an American, I logically would be a good judge of this.   

On the land we have in the country; together with my wife's family, we grow all our own food.  We have fruit trees, grape vines and a yearly garden that provides all the family's needs through the winter. Making preserves in jars basically makes us independent.  Having chickens provides us with a steady supply of natural eggs as well.  The country house has its own deep well and so its independent of municipal water and the heating is wood burning.  It's a great satisfaction for a product of an American suburb like myself  to have gone back to a natural lifestyle with an intimate relationship with nature and the traditional way of life.  Most of the villagers still go around with horse drawn wagons so in a way, I did eventually find my very own "Little House in the Prairie". 

In closing, I'd like to encourage any Americans who are not satisfied with the society they live in to take the necessary courage and try moving to a place where they can find a simpler, more natural way of living, free of debt and free from the consequences of a diabolical foreign policy and a collapsing economy.  It doesn't cost as much as you might think and it all starts with a dream.  Hold your ideal in your mind at all times and eventually you will manifest this ideal in your own life. Never accept anything that does not reflect your ideal and it will never touch you. There is no utopia and every place has its own unique problems but never underestimate the power of your own ideas and dreams.  The Kingdom is within you and you can live it in the place of your choosing. Spiritually speaking, we're all citizens of that Kingdom and we're all linked together in this shared principle of family, morals, Love, Truth and goodness. Simplicity is the key and the simpler you live your life, the more you will enjoy it. If you don't fear evil, you render it powerless against you and it disappears as darkness disappears when you turn on the light switch. Cultivate your spirituality and your ideal and you will find your very own promised land; your very own "Little House on the Prairie" no matter what you've been through.  Now go find it!!

Scruples - the game of moral dillemas

Comments for "American Celbrates Life ... in Romania"

Laura said (February 20, 2010):

I'm so sick of my generation (baby boomers and even older ages) and their materialism and values. Several friends in Texas are retiring to central Amer. Nicaragua or Costa Rica. For those that have ties (family, etc) and don't want to relocate, the best thing is to find others with same values (not many to be found), and live with the motto "less is more" ; quit spending on junk, sell/donate what you don't need to charity, spend more time reading, outdoor activities, bike riding, going to state parks, camping, etc. Eliminate people from your life that don't share same values, even if it is relatives. Don McAlvany (may be spelled McIlvany) has a good list of things on his website about simplifying and getting ready for the collapse. Few will heed the warnings.

Corey said (February 18, 2010):

Dear Christine,

Thank you for exhibiting such an arrogant, selfish, immature, and sociopathic attitude in your comment. You merely prove Henry Makow and everyone else's point: the majority of American women are extremely selfish, immature, sociopathic, and arrogant, and completely unfit for relationships. You are living proof of why so many American men refuse to marry, date, or have anything to do with American women and thus seek women from other parts of the world. You are like a broken piece of glass which is trying to sell itself as a diamond, but those of us who are intelligent can see you for the fraud that you are. Yes, us American men are "whimps", as you called us (also, it is spelled wimps, not "whimps"), and we are too "dull and lifeless" for you big and strong and independent American women. Good luck living in Mexico, and let's hope that your husband doesn't find higher class merchandise once you move there with him.

Hasher said (February 17, 2010):

I found this article strange to a degree. Having my roots in Romania and living about half my life there, and half of it in the "land of the free", I have some perspective. ... I will paraphrase a woman who came on this site regarding another article and stated that while Men want to blame women, they should remember that women are MALLEABLE. Women by design will shape accordingly to what Men want. So the status of women in America is so perverse and horrid because men allowed them to change into d*kes (for lack of a better word). Add in the fact that the new generations of men are emasculated, and you have an upside down scenario of men with no backbone, and women with over the top backbones.

While in our family we have agreed that American men are good, and women are whacked out, we also understand that the 'new' American male is an effeminate coward. Man in America is no longer an Alpha. Is running to another country to find 'love' or 'the special someone' really the right choice?

RAY said (February 13, 2010):

Hey Kevin you make it sound so easy but unfortunately Amerika will follow you everywhere you go and make sure that you will never be able get away.

I escaped to the Dominican Republic and within months of me moving here they invaded Haiti, they taken over the Airport as well as control everything going on with boots on the ground and an Aircraft carrier off the coast, now I have them breathing down my neck in my backyard in the Dominican Republic, with no signs of them ever leaving
What luck! hey.

You thought you had gotten away from Amerika by going to Romania too, but guess what buddy? Amerka comes to you!

"Romanian President Traian Basescu said on Thursday his country had approved a U.S. plan to deploy interceptor missiles as part of a missile shield to protect Europe."

So the Russians are not very happy campers about now and are saying that if you expect them to sit still while Amerika sets up missiles in their backyard and expect them to do nothing you got another thing coming and will consider Romania a legitimate military target! Ah what fun!

N in Russia said (February 13, 2010):

Well, it would be difficult to generalize about Russian women as, with any group that size, they're a very diverse lot. "Russians" are only one of many ethnicities in the country, and each has it's own physical, cultural and personality differences.

The 20-something women are rapidly becoming more Westernized, the over-40 women grew up during the Soviet period and still have a lot of it's "grey" mindset. In general though, I think it would be safe to say that, in comparison to Western women, a much higher percentage of the women here are "good marriage material." of course, we all witnessed the "Russian Bride Craze" during the '90s when times were more prosperous and a lot of Western men had the wherewithal to endure the hassle and expense of finding a good woman overseas. As for Russian women's attraction to Western men, the marriage agencies would have you believe that it's mainly due to a demographic shortage of men in Russia ... but I think it's more a factor of the quality of Russian men (a lot of them are just plain loutish and irresponsible).

As for me, well, I'm now 56 and a foreigner, but I have met women here, and have even had several girlfriends. For me though, happiness is a "by-product" of my life and environment, and trying to experience love and romance in Russia could be compared to trying to have dinner in an abatoir ... I'm still hungry, but I lost my appetite a long time ago ... and after two horrible marriages to and divorces from American women, I'm just not able to trust women (or anyone else for that matter).

Robert Finnegan said (February 13, 2010):

More and more Amerikans are leaving the sinking ship of the United States, having realized that the country is now a fascist dictatorship and Amerikans do not have the stomach for another revolution. "The American Dream" is now DOA. Instead, sheep-like, the vast majority of Amerikans allow agencies such as the Child Support Enforcement Division (Alaska's premier criminal organization) to destroy their lives and drive them into abject poverty. As an investigative journalist I spoke with many men who waited too long to get out, before CSED began seizing passports. I had predicted this years ago, and now it has come to pass. They are trapped, virtual slaves doing slave labor for the criminal regime. They will in all probability never get out, eventually dying on the streets of a dying city in a dying country.

In mid-2001 I was already telling myself that the gig was up and it was time to get out.... anywhere but the U.S. Investigative journalists were already being harassed by the satanic Bush administration. I landed in Jakarta on assignment and picked up a fantastic translator, a multi-degreed young lady who shared my beliefs on the state of affairs in the U.S. and its one-sided relationship with the Republic of Indonesia. After literally saving my life on several occasions I came to the conclusion that this was the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Being a former Marine I was aware of the horror stories about Asia women who wanted a meal-ticket to the U.S. and I was startled when my future wife expressed no interest in even visiting Amerika. An ardent nationalist, she desired to stay in Indonesia to work with the poor.

We were married in 2001 and I left the car, the house and the career in the U.S. to live in this incredible country, where there is a story on every street corner. It was touch and go at first with immigration, however now the laws have become more realistic and allow for a wife to sponsor a husband. We are very happy, and my wife is a real woman, delightfully feminine and dedicated to taking care of me while pursuing a career. I would never consider touching a Western woman - particularly an American shemale - again. I never tire of watching her, and she is wise beyond her years and fearless.

At 51, a time when most men are thinking of the end of the road, I am alive and growing spiritually.. this place, and its women strip the years off western men. With 17,000 islands in this archipelago I could spend the rest of my life exploring, photographing and diving it and still not see everything. There is real culture here, all of it ancient. It is a fascinating place for the historian, both amateur and professional and it is not an English speaking country, so learning the language in order to function is both a challenge for a guy my age and a unique experience.

We have been married 10 years now and the time passes quickly... too quickly. I have never regretted my decision and never looked back, except to shake my head at those who remain in the U.S. when escape is relatively easy and can be accomplished for very little money. It's tough in the beginning, but anything that is worth having does not come easy.

I am madly in love with my wife, and my Indonesian family is beautiful. This was the best decision I have ever made because along with my wife and family here, I am a free man. Free to live and do as I please.

My advice to all Amerikan men: Get out. Get out NOW, while you still can. Indonesia isn't for everybody, however there are enough countries in Southeast Asia alone for you to find a new home that meets your needs. Good luck and feel free to drop me a line if you have any questions. I will gladlyassist where I can anyone attempting to leave what was once America.

Robert S. Finnegan
SoutheastAsia Independent Media
[email protected]
Jakarta, Indonesia

That goes for you too Henry!

Robert S. Finnegan
Southeastasia Independent Media
Jakarta, Indonesia


Jeffrey said (February 13, 2010):

Thanks for your expat articles. I too have thought about getting out of America though I can't get a passport because of a $5,000 child support debt. My daughter who is 18 doesn't even call me Dad and now lives with her Grandma and Grandpa on the road to hell. Thanks to court system I have had no active role in her live and despite the fact that I have fulfilled over 90% of my obligation to my daughter she is to say the least estranged from me. The whole Family Court system is designed to destroy the American family and with that the American fabric. The American people best wake up and realize that the CPS and Child Support/Divorce racket is going to be the ruin of this Republic. The way they treat our American veterans is beyond appalling. Children are a gift from GOD the fruit of the womb is indeed His reward. The whole point and purpose is our Government is to protect our God given rights not take them. The American government has failed it's chief design.

Christine said (February 13, 2010):

I found your article about more Americans leaving Amerika from a link from my favorite website: Men are not the only Americans jumping ship. I am an American woman married to a man from Guatemala. If anything were to happen to my husband, I would NEVER go back to American men. American men are whimps, along side FOREIGN BORN latinos, they seem dull and lifeless. I did not set out to become involved with Mexicans and Guatemalans: the whole long, bizzare story is at my website: , but when people ask me why I feel the way I do, I say: "once you taste the salsa, who wants to go back to ketchup?." I disparately want to leave the United States, and as soon as I can scrape together the money, I will join my husband in Mexico. He was deported in 2007, a turn of events I was pleased with because I wanted to leave the land of the the free and the home of the brave. He was the one who did not want to leave, and deportation was the only way he was going to leave.

I have always been an outsider in my own country and culture because I never bought into the myth of the American dream, and that happiness comes from work, work, work, and buy, buy, buy., much to the chagrin of my father.

My father is now a miserable, frustrated 87 year old multi millionaire (who hates my husband, by the way) who has come to the end of his life and realizes that although he has everything money can buy, it was a wasted life. Men were completely controlled long before the Womens Movement ever started.

It is AMERIKAN CULTURE that is destroying the soul of Americans. The culture of the 1950's was just as stifiling to the soul, and Americans have NEVER been happy, because materialism NEVER buys happiness. I spend 99 percent of my time in the company of foreigners. That's the only way I can continue to live here and keep my sanity.

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at