Direct Link to Latest News


Women See Male Leadership as Love

September 10, 2008

by Henry Makow Ph.D.

(From May 10, 2008)

If a man cannot perform in bed, h
e is called "impotent."  The woman feels unloved and unwanted.

However, outside the bedroom, if a man doesn't demonstrate his power , he is considered "enlightened" and "progressive."

But somewhere in their subconscious, women still feel let down. For centuries, women (and children) have relied on men to help define their  lives. Men are failing their families when they buy into egalitarian feminist shibboleths and try to be "nice guys."

Marriage is the exchange of female power for male power expressed as love. Women crave male power because in their minds, it is love.

When a man fails to lead his family, and allows them to manipulate him, women (and children) feel unloved and consequently have less respect and love for him.

The old proverb, "Spare the rod, spoil the child" applies. Women and children feel most secure when husband/ father asserts his just control. It means he loves them. Failure to take charge is interpreted as neglect.

Thus, a man must claim power at the outset, and never let it slip from his grasp. He will be tested. But if I am right, women are testing his love.

This is  what women really want: to be consulted yes, but to surrender to the one man worthy of their sacrifice.


Thus the Lucifer-loving central bankers have used feminism, the mass media and the courts to banish love by undermining male power and authority. They have brainwashed generations of men and women to think of themselves as equal and identical.  The goal is to destroy the family which obstructs their plan to enslave humanity, mentally and spiritually if not physically. (They must do this to protect their untenable monopoly on credit and ensure we repay money they created out of nothing.)

Gender, love and indeed sex are largely about power.  Men want to possess a woman. Women want to be possessed. But when you equalize power, you neuter both sexes. Men no longer assert their power; women no longer cultivate their charms.  The active-passive; yin-yang mainspring of the universe is neutralized. All that is left is sex in an alcoholic stupor.

A recent study showed that a third of young men and a quarter of young women in Europe use alcohol and drugs to have promiscuous sex, many before the age of 16, resulting in unwanted pregnancies and STD's.

In the UK, arrests of young women for being drunk and disorderly have shot up %50. The crime rate is up 25% in the last three years alone.

Women are being left high and dry (or drunk) as men bail on the concept of marriage altogether.

Female sex appeal is a function of their fertility. It will quickly fade, and they will finally realize that a sinister power has subverted our culture and betrayed them. They need to form families when they are young and desirable to men or risk being alone for the rest of their lives.

Young men must again think of themselves primarily as family leaders and builders, and look for a good woman to be wife and mother of their children. They must quickly weed out the damaged women, or find one that is still salvageable. They must test her over time to make sure she is devoted and not only willing but happy to accept their leadership. If she has another big priority, move on.

Men, confine yourself to women who look up to you. If you're looking up to her, the relationship is doomed.


By "empowering" women, society is essentially outfitting them with penises. These women have been conditioned to distrust and constantly challenge any man. I have heard stories where husbands and wives fight over the direction they will take on a Sunday afternoon walk.

When my wife and I walk the dog, I decide where we will go. When my wife wants to go in another direction, she will tell me, and usually I will consent to make her happy.   She gives me the power; I use it to make her happy, within my limits.

Many men leave their families because they feel they are "married to Mommy" and constantly "walking on eggshells." In practice "equality" for a feminist usually means she's in charge and her husband is her puppet who must love her as she thinks fit. "Equality" means at best she will castrate him; at worst, abuse him.

There are many exceptions to this rule I imagine: couples who think alike and have great "equal" marriages. I haven't met any but I'd like to hear about them. 

In a marriage, I believe a woman must chose between power and love. She cannot have both.  The role of a wife is to empower her husband so he can love her better as he sees fit. Of course it all depends on a woman finding a man she can trust wholeheartedly.

We must get over the notion that we'll be loved for our looks or personality or talent. These contribute but ultimately men love women who look after them, and vice-versa.

In our intimate relations, men need to project power plain and simple. First men must gain self confidence by realizing personal goals and earning recognition and reward.

Sexual desire makes men overestimate women. We must take sex and beautiful women off the pedestal. Our cultural values were/are created by a sick satanic sex cult, cabalistic Freemasonry, which thinks sex is the Holy Grail.


Masculinity is defined by power. Men must assert their personal vision and responsible leadership in spite of constant sabotage by the mass media and government. Otherwise women and children will feel betrayed and unloved, become more unmanageable, and trigger family breakdown.

In reality men and women were designed to complement, love and need each other.  Gender wars were created by the same people who created all wars, the cabalistic central bankers  who have been waging a secret satanically-inspired feud against humanity for centuries-- to divide, degrade, demoralize and ultimately to enslave us.   

Scruples - the game of moral dillemas

Comments for "Women See Male Leadership as Love"

Catherine said (December 14, 2008):


Only my opinion of course- but I feel feminism is a patriarchal creation which leads women to believe they are more free and equal, but that is not so.

Mothers and women are now slaves to the work,, slaves to the kitchen and children, and ARE ENDING UP EXHAUSTED and powerless, which is perfect for the controllers-

They are getting control of the children earlier- always an advantage.

They are causing trauma due to lack of bonding, fear of abandonment and mothers trying to deny the pain of leaving children with strangers so early- against nature.

But, this is all perfect, as it willl lead to psychiatric illnesses early on- and they will need to be medicated- thus getting total control of the children earlier.

I could go on, but I am sure you understand.

Kind Regards.


Christine said (September 11, 2008):

Hi Henry,

Again, Mrs. Palin's troubles [see link below] seem to be yet another example of the fact that feminism does not work and is designed to destroy people. As a former housekeeper, I have watched what happens when a woman tries to maintain a career outside the home and raise children - it can't be done. She cannot be in 2 places at once.

The mother is consumed with guilt for abandoning her children and won't correct her children. She leaves them at home alone during the summer break and then wonders why they are leading bad lives and ruining themselves with drink and rugs.

The father spinelessly goes along with this charade and lives in denial that his children are incorrigible. Mainly because the feminist movement shouts him down whenever he tries to exert his authority. As the saying goes, who wears the pants in the family? Both literally and figuratively, it's the mother these days.


Tina said (September 11, 2008):

Most women yearn for men to lead them in the right direction and when men refuse to lead, than women take the lead, as seen today.

Some years ago when I was busy digging about myself and my past and thought I would be forever young, I read a book entitled, Iron John, by Robert Bly, an American poet from Minnesota.

Bly demonstrates the need for men to learn from other men on how to honor and re-imagine the positive image of their masculinity, which has been stolen from them through emotional rape. There is one chapter in his book, if I remember well, wherein Bly writes about the Sioux tribe and how men initiate their sons to become men, starting at the age of seven by removing them from the claws of their mothers. The Sioux’s have a belief that as soon as a boy reaches seven, the mother no longer looks at her son in the eye, as they know a mother’s flirtatious habits leads to inappropriate bonding which results to sexual addiction of any kind, including homosexuality. Basically any sexual overtone between mother and son does not exist with the Sioux tribe, as it exists with Christians and other religions. It is well known that having a father absent from the home often times leads to one of the weaker son in the family to take on the role of husband.

You write that, “Men must assert their personal vision and responsible leadership in spite of constant sabotage by the mass media and government”. The biggest obstacle men must overcome is the relationship with their mothers and subsequently their addiction to sex due to the inappropriate relationship with their mothers. Thus, it is my opinion Henry that until men chose to not see how they have been damaged by their own up bringing, men won’t be able to lead properly. It is a very bad cycle not having men to lead as God intended them to, because for starters women and children feel betrayed and unloved, and as a result become more unmanageable and this leads to family breakdown.

Question is how bad men want to lead? And how can men lead when they have no role model to look up too?

Richard said (September 11, 2008):

I wanted to tell you, I am twice-divorced, and I think your analysis of the current situation between men and women in the Western world is SPOT-ON! As a man in my forties, I cannot afford the risk of marrying again and having to start over from zero when I am 50 because a "Modern-Woman" decided to kick my butt to the curb. It really annoys me the Luciferian Globalists have been so successful in destroying the family, but the risks are so great for the single man that this is one battle I choose not to engage in.)

Derrick said (September 11, 2008):

Thanks for your site. A real eye opener. Now I know why my relationship failed with my ex-girl. She desperately wanted a man to take charge, but due to my lack of direction, and weak behavior, I gave up power, and it crumbled.

I see it happening with my parents now, and so many men around me, wives not respecting husbands, relationships eroding... It's sad. people pay more attention to Britney Spears than their own lives. You do good work, it seems even without a profit motive.

God Bless.

Dan said (September 11, 2008):

"...her husband is her puppet who must love her as she thinks fit."

Exactly the problem Henry. In our feminized (and degenerate) society, women define what marriage is, what a wife is, what a husband is and what society should 'look like'.

Opportunistic men take advantage of women by agreeing with them in order to remain juvenile playboys. Women aren't capable of seeing this for what it is.

Answer said (May 15, 2008):

Answer to a reader's problem:

These issues should have been addressed before marriage. Now it's like trying to shut the barn door after the horses have left.

Any time a man does not assert total power, he is creating a power vacuum. You must make clear that you are the final arbiter of all things important. She must obey you. Of course you will consult her and take her wishes into account. You want to please her. If she doesn't accept, dump her. Love for a woman involves trust and respect. She doesn't.

That's my view, Henry

Andrea said (May 15, 2008):

I have just read your article (on titled,
THE HIDDEN AGENDA AND SOCIAL ENGINEERING." With all due respect, I must say, I have never personally encountered anyone imprisoned by as much sexual inadequacy as you, Sir. But you DO have a very good reason to be afraid of women. First and foremost, in this lagging economy with high unemployment and massive layoffs for the male-dominated trades, women are actually gaining jobs. Secondly, more women also graduate college than men. Thirdly, many, many women
are now deciding to actually go solo and raise their kids (as well as spend their elder years) by
themselves. This is the result of male tyranny, not a female's inability to understand your kind of "love."

I too, would be a fraid of being so diminished and
marginalized if I were you. But you have no one to blame but yourself.

I have worked with many women who have dementia as a result of the kind of "love" you descibe. If you don't use your mind, your will, your individuality, you will certainly lose it.

I believe taking a college-level archeology class may prevent you from sounding so ignorant in the future.

Tantra Goddess said (May 14, 2008):

Your efforts are futile. Mark every woman's words. The time of domination by men, of this planet, this DYING world, and women, REAL women, is over. OVER.

Sad to see you so delusional. Sigh.

Marilyn said (May 12, 2008):

Ah, if we would only follow what’s written in a very old, time-proven book about relationships called The Bible. Interesting stuff! I spent 10 years in God’s “Beauty School” just trying to develop what God says He thinks is beautiful in a woman: a quiet and gentle spirit. I’m still not there 100% of the time but I keep working on it.

And speaking of male leadership in marriage – The same book says in Ephesians 5, after telling wives to submit to their husbands as unto the Lord (a scripture that can cause a good feminist to froth at the mouth!) - “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

That’s a tall order for a husband, a very tall order. And my take on it as a woman is that any man who willingly does that is worth every ounce of respect his wife can give him.

Here’s the trick for women: Don’t even think about marrying a man who you can’t or won’t respect in this way. And if you lay out this scripture to the man you are considering marrying, and he doesn’t willingly agree to his part, get out of the relationship.

So a good practice for unmarried women is to work on treating all men respectfully. I delete male-bashing emails that are sent to me and don’t forward them. I refuse to participate in male-bashing conversations. I don’t make fun of men and act like women are smarter than them – we’re not! I defend good men at every opportunity. I thank them when they are protective toward me and kind to me. I dress femininely at all times - but not provocatively which is disrespectful to their extremely visual nature (I gave up wearing denim 20 years ago, Henry, and yes, I agree with your Jeans article).

I’ve been reading your articles for years and am so grateful for your brave, courageous voice and manly leadership! What a fine example you are. Thank you, dear Henry, thank you.

Martha said (May 11, 2008):

i love your articles. feminism is a hoax. the whole man/women issue has gotten so twisted. and perverted. i wish we could honor each other's roles the way god intended them to be. i don't want to be a man and i would love to have a wonderful, strong, protective man in my life like you describe in your articles.

thank you for having the courage to speak out.

Jason Graduates w/distinction said (May 11, 2008):

When I was supposed to be studying at school, I loved to sit in the computer lab and get what I thought was actually a real education – reading and thinking about your articles! I’ve been following them for more than 3 years now, and each one is enlightening. I grew up in Canadian society where the girls’ favourite chant on the playground was “anything boys can do girls can do better,” but at the same time my teachers would tell us boys not to throw the ball very hard to tag the girls as when we were trying to tag the boys. I was raised to pander to this sort of rubbish, and your articles have helped immensely to unravel it.

I’ve been married for 10 years now, and I’ve always felt like I had to walk on eggshells. It seemed as though I was always one unwitting error away from having my sexual rights rescinded (we both believe in monogamy, so she is the only object of these affections for me), so I was virtually rendered ineffective as a man and leader in the home. How? Whenever I asserted my leadership it was a question in my mind of if I was willing to give up my wife’s sexual affections, so I would rarely go there, and if I began, I would quickly retreat.

Our family came to a critical point a few months ago, and our counselor chalked it up to stress. I took stress management courses, and learned about assertiveness. Since then I came to the conclusion that I had the tendency to be passive, and she was probably withholding sex from me because she did not respect me at all.

One day I came home from work intent on following through with a plan I had all week to take one of my children and go do an errand, spending some one-on-one time with them. She said we should all go so she could be with me, too, and I initially said that should be fine. A couple of minutes later I went up to her and said, no, I was going as I had planned, and that I had no explanation for her other than that, but the plan would proceed as it had been. She was fine with it. Even commented later that it was refreshing. Some great sex after that just put the final coat on my shiny, newfound manhood.

Although I graduated from university “with distinction,” it paled in comparison to this new level of distinction.

Thanks for this additional evidence women don't respect men they can control. If you had been willing to forego sex before, you would have found, no doubt, the sex better than ever.


Paul said (May 11, 2008):

I've just read "Women See Male Leadership as Love" and I must admit that you've hit the bail on the head. It's simply true - which is high praise. Finding simplicity in nature among the complexity is the tricky part. It would also explain why father custody societies are the most stable. Stephen Baskerville writes about this and I would recommend his work to you.

Lisa said (May 11, 2008):

There is nothing I dread worse than hearing "you decide" from my husband! Day in and day out, I feel as if he "walks on eggshells" with me, ever fearing to offend me, ever fearing that I might leave. So what if I'm offended? So what if I leave? STAND UP & BE A MAN! Stop acting so fearful! It is so unbecoming -- and in acting this way you are going to cause the very thing you feared to occur.

I want to be possessed by someone I can trust, someone who will act logically (instead of emotionally) and stick to what he says, no matter what.

I want to give someone my love, my submission, and trust him completely.

I want my opinion heard and considered, but I DON'T WANT TO MAKE THE DECISIONS! I desire to be a woman. When the man hands over the power, or fails to use it himself -- his role in the family -- he is, in essence, handing over his penis for the woman to wear.

When you do this, you men, this handing over of your power, when she looks back at you, she sees a emasculated man for which she has no attraction. And eventually, I do believe, we will search until we find that which we are looking for -- and in the case of the "eggshell" woman, that will be a man worthy of her her love.

Stand up, I adjure you young men. Stand up and be real men. Stop this feminist garbage, and you will be surprised that without much effort on your part, you will attract the right kind of woman, for she's had it with most of today's effeminate men.

Jessica said (May 11, 2008):

I remember my cousin's divorce came as a shock to everyone, not to me. He is a Major in the Army and I would hang out at his house when I was a private stationed in Germany. He would always ask me to make him a glass of Pepsi. I would feel so honored to make his Pepsi for him. I felt included in his life and I felt like he loved me because he could have asked anyone to make his Pepsi for him. I felt special because he wanted me to do it.

Then he asked his wife to get him a glass of milk. She did it, but she said out loud that she didn't understand why she was getting him milk when he could get it himself. Every time he asked her for something she would say that she didn't know why she was doing this.

He invited me over for dinner saying that his wife was cooking dinner for us. But when I arrived she said she didn't feel like cooking. We ended up going to Burger King.

She acted jealous of me too. She acted like she was afraid her husband would leave her for me. That would be incest. We're cousins for the love of Pete. Prezygotic barrier.

Chris from Switzerland said (May 10, 2008):

"Women See Male Leadership As Love" is a truly thought-provoking article. At first I thought you were exagerating (you know, we grow up with this humanist BS of fraternité, egalité etc.. But then I reflected and realized that I have experienced a similar thing: the woman tore herself free from "my care and control" and tried to live her freedom; with disastrous, yes tragic results, of course.

And I have seen many sad cases where the wife tried to ascertain her feminist-inspired independence, carve out "a niche in life" for herself (i.e. a career of her own, anything to stand up seemingly equal to him) and destroy the marriage relationship as a result.

Let's not let it happen so much, men! We should teach our kids some of these lessons of life, instead of stuffing their minds with empty facts and wrong principles. Keep up the good work of thinking revolutionary thoughts and warning the duped.

Angie said (May 10, 2008):

I enjoy reading your articles and agree with you on many occasions. I was raised in a home that viewed women as staying home and raising children and the men "bringing home the bacon".

Ironically as soon as I was 18 I was told to get a job and get out of the house. I have been working ever since and I have yet to meet a man who wants to work and have his wife stay home. Many men today view a women staying at home as a lazy women who will do nothing but run up his credit cards and watch soap operas and eat bon bons. I was married for a short time but divorced him when he began to steal money from me. Our incomes were not shared. I kept my income seperate due to circumstances that arose after we married. He saw things as "what's yours is mine and what's mine is mine". He had a full time job and did not need the money. Every man I have met and dated wants nothing but to sit in front of a computer and play video games, watch porn and become annoyed at the notion of having to work.

I have even had a few tell me that they would prefer to have me work so they can stay home. I am thirty something and cannot stand video games or porn. Both should be banned as they have done nothing but bring about the destruction of the family. Children, men and women become addicted to video games as well as become obese.

What happened to going camping, hiking, spending time with our families? I am in excellent physical shape and love spending time outdoors. Is there a man on planet earth who wants to go hiking, camping, mountain biking or travel??? I have a deep faith and attract a lot of male attention.

I am just looking for someone who won't spend all of his time playing video games and doesn't need porn, smoke or drink. I have grown tired of all the excuses that I hear whenever the evil minions dangle something new at all the sheep.

At this point in time I would prefer to stay single and live alone rather than date another one of these porn, video game addicted men. Wow what a selection... The times have changed and with the changes have come many unfortunate cirumstances. It is time to change the direction we are headed before it's too late. Thank you for your time.

Dan said (May 10, 2008):

Many men of this era have probably experienced a woman they were involved with seeming to become belligerent and even mocking, in the middle of a ordinary conversation or activity. Only a few years ago I realized this is a pretty universal response from a woman when she's expecting the man to make a decision. We men usually are dumfounded, for it can happen over something as simple as a woman asking, 'where are we going for dinner?' The politically correct man will answer, "I dunno. Where would you like to go?" And he's completely lost when the woman suddenly acts vexed for the rest of the evening.

That's a small example, but I use it because I'm sure everyone's experienced it. I don't think women think about it or think they should have to explain it to a man. It's assumed he knows why. Whether consciously or not, she's just deferred to him to make a decision for both of them, and to her mind he's blown it. Of course she's angry - she's shown him respect, and he's let her down. .

Feminism has drummed it into men's minds for fourty years that they must ask approval for absolutely every little decision involving a woman. I suspect that the real engineers of feminism (old aristocratic men, such as Lord Bertrand Russell), understood exactly how women would react to men who followed this etiquette.

In reality, women despise any appearance of indecisiveness in a man, much more do they despise it in one they're considering for a mate. In that circumstance the woman actually takes it as an insult to her 'gift' of deferring decisions to him.

Once I had this epiphany, I've asked several women about it, and they agreed.
Being decisive doesn't rule out taking a woman's thoughts into consideration. If it's a serious matter and she wants to really discuss it, that's psychologically different. Gender relations is an art of of interpersonal empathy, not an ideology.

I think that men have been trained for fourty years to invite open discussion of every decision with a woman until it's become second nature. It was sold on the notion of 'equality' and seems very democratic. So for fourty years every movie and television show we see shows men and women in constant debate and competition. People mimic the behavior and are dumbfounded why ti doesn't seem to work in real situations the way it works in a script.

So next time a woman shows you the respect to ask where you're going for dinner, fellas, tell her without hesitation, and there'll be no argument. (if there is, stand your ground, she's just not convinced and it testing your decisiveness).

Once you start acting decisively instead of putting every little matter on the floor for debate, you may find that you have to think ahead. Men have actually become rather lazy in making decisions from a lifetime of 'sharing' the decision making process. Start practicing making decisions aforehand, thoughtfully considering what's really best and also considerate of the woman, and you'll discover that a good decision gets no argument, and more than just a little respect from a woman.

After you mastered thinking ahead, you can move to the advanced habit of thinking on your feet. Women still expect this, don't let the sit-coms fool you.

“How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being?” - Oscar Wilde
Wilde was a lat 19th century homosexual, but this quip shows greater understanding of women than heterosexual men retain in the post-feminist era we live in

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at