Direct Link to Latest News


Makow- Restoring the M/F Power Dynamic

March 21, 2024


The gesture of a man opening a door for a woman affirms both his masculinity and her femininity. 

The biggest relationship problem men have today is lack of self-confidence. No one will believe in someone who does not believe in himself.

Young men develop self-confidence by setting goals and meeting them. Women are desperate for marriage. Never forget. Men are the buyers. Women are the sellers.

Take away sex and I estimate 80% of women today have nothing to offer a man.

Women used to align their interests with those of men and society. But humanity has been colonized by a satanic cult, the Illuminati who are pushing depopulation and the breakup of the nuclear family.

Cabalist Jewish bankers and their Masonic flunkies (Communists, Satanists) convinced women that serving the people they love, their families, is "oppressive." They need to be "independent" instead.  As result, millions of women are deprived of their natural biological and social role and are flailing about like fish out of water

Heterosexuality is based on the exchange of female (worldly) power for male power expressed as love. Women want love. Men want power. Heterosexual marriage is an exchange of the two. Feminism taught women to seek power instead of love. The result is both male and female are neutered.

Men must reassert their power.  A man must enlist (not petition) the right woman, his future wife, to realize his vision for life. A woman must surrender to the right man, her future husband. This is how women love. Of course, a man asserts his male prerogative with finesse, winning consent by loving persuasion.

Women need sex as much as men. A woman is only too happy to have a sexual relationship in the context of love and marriage, when she is recognized and treated as a human being and not a sex object.

Men should focus on women who "look up" to them. If you're looking for your "equal," you're probably still looking for yourself. 

Reclaiming Male Power in the Viagra Age

(slightly revised from Oct 24, 2001 & July 17, 2018)

by Henry Makow PhD

You've heard of the "Stone Age," the "Iron Age" and the "Information Age." This is the "Viagra Age" -- the era of male impotence. Television commercials say 1/3 of all men suffer from "erectile deficiency" attributed to old age, high blood pressure, prostate cancer, or diabetes.

I suspect that often the real culprit is feminism. Women should empower men but for a long time, they've been doing the opposite. Instead of taking Viagra, men need to reclaim their masculine power.


In the workplace, a man can accept leadership from a competent woman. But in the intimate sphere, a man who takes orders from a woman is not a man, and usually can't perform like one. He sees his mother and feels like a child again.

Power is synonymous with masculine identity. Impotent literally means "powerless." We would never say a woman is "impotent." Rather, she is "infertile" or "frigid" reflecting her passive or receptive role.

A man cannot love if he does not have power. He exercises his power on behalf of his wife and family. Women take away male power and wonder why they aren't loved.


I felt liberated after I finally understood the power dynamic. I decided to look abroad for a traditional woman. After a misstep in the Philippines (described in my book A Long Way to Go for a Date), I married an educated, intelligent Mexican woman from a secular Jewish background similar to my own. For the first time in my life, I have found contentment and so has she. We have an almost friction-less relationship.

She tells me what she's thinking but she never tells me what to do. She avoids the 4 C's: She does not complain, criticize, control and compete. In the past, women constantly blackmailed me by childish scenes or passive-aggressive tactics.

I find myself cringing in expectation of this. It doesn't happen.

The division of labor reflects our preferences. I do all the shopping and cooking. She mows the lawn. 


The gesture of a man opening a door for a woman illustrates how men and women should relate. We all know a woman can open a door herself. But when a man does it, he is affirming her femininity, beauty or charm. When she accepts this gesture, she is validating his masculine power. This trade, woman surrendering her power in exchange for man's love, is the essence of heterosexuality. In order to develop emotionally, men and women need this mutual validation as much as sex itself. Exclusive sex is an expression of it.

Under the toxic influence of feminism, women open their own doors. Neither sex's identity is validated, neither matures emotionally. Men feel redundant and impotent; women feel rejected and unsexed.



The following are some practical tips to help men restore their power.

  • The best way to select a woman is to make a reasonable request. If she clicks her heels, salutes and says, "Oui, mon Captain," she's eligible. (I'm exaggerating.) On a summer day, before I remarried, I met a young woman who was rollerblading. I asked her to take off her sunglasses so I could see her face. She obeyed. That was a positive early sign. Courtship is the process by which a man earns a woman's trust (love) so that she will accept his leadership. Men express love in terms of benevolent power and perceive a women's love as her acceptance of his protection. A woman wants a man to make her feel secure.

  • Feminism encourages men to pursue "independent" women and reject the women they actually need. If a woman wants to be "independent," she doesn't want you. If her dating profile says "Are you man enough for me?" or "I'm high maintenance," decline the challenge. Life is too short. Marriage is not about independence. It is about two people becoming one and that only happens when a woman surrenders leadership to a man.

  • Men give their power to a woman in hopes of getting love, sex and beauty. For a while she is flattered, but ultimately she cannot respect a man she can control. Women trade power for love. When men do it, they become women.  A woman wants to be drafted not petitioned. She wants a man to have a wholesome vision of his life, in which she has an essential place. This vision need not be elaborate or complicated. It could involve a life focused on mutual values and interests, like children, music, health food, church, sports, dogs or the outdoors.

  • 5c27115943ac58d3a6ef194c99e431b5-30875736.pngThere is a book entitled: Why do I Think I am Nothing Without a Man (1982) The author, Dr. Penelope Russianoff, tries to help women overcome this feeling. The truth is, this feeling is grounded in reality. Self-fulfillment for a woman is when the "self" is her husband and children. Women self-sacrifice and serve; in return, they are deservedly cherished. If the "self" is her personal satisfaction and career, she is already full and filled. Her husband and children are secondary. 

  • Most women  crave their husband's intense and exclusive love. In her book, The Psychology of Women, (1944) psychiatrist Helene Deutsche said woman are masochistic-narcissistic by nature. They sacrifice (masochism) in exchange for love (narcissism.) She is his queen. He is her Knight in Shining Armour. It's Power for Love. If he does not reward her sacrifice with love, the contract is null and void.

  • A man wouldn't be attracted to so many beautiful women if he asked, "to which woman can I entrust my spirit?" His seed is the symbol of his spirit. Similarly, the sex act is very invasive for a woman. It should be reserved for love, ideally marriage. Anonymous sex and promiscuity are dehumanizing and degrading, proof that society has been invaded by a perverse occult force. (Cabalism.) 

  • We really seek intimacy. You cannot have intimacy without love and commitment. 


A man can reclaim his identity by recognizing that his power is non-negotiable. It represents his ability to love. It is the essence of his masculinity.

A man should focus on women who are receptive to him and ignore the rest. She may be behind a counter rather than an executive desk, a barista rather than a brain surgeon.

A single man should be aggressive and quickly sift without concern for rejection. Be wary of women who are from broken marriages or hate their fathers.

A man must be prepared to offer the right woman a profound relationship. She is not interested in "hooking up." She does not want to be "gamed." She is the ground on which he cultivates a family. He "husbands."

Single men are so passive and juvenile today that single women are climbing the walls. We need to "man up."

As my father taught me, work is the backbone of a man. He must find self-confidence in professional achievement and recognition.

Men represent the active principle; women the passive. We have the power and if we don't use it constructively, we will continue to fail women.

Makow - Young Women Have Lost the Script
------------What is Feminine? 
----------  Psychiatrist Explains how Feminism Causes Frigidity
 ---------- Wife  Must Surrender to Husband to Achieve Unity 

----------------  Having Sex is Not Making Love 

Scruples - the game of moral dillemas

Comments for "Makow- Restoring the M/F Power Dynamic "

RH said (March 21, 2024):

Its been 23 years since you first wrote this good advice. Young men born in 2001 should be husbands and fathers…but they are often not.

Young men today are looking at the divorce statistics; they also remember how their own fathers were treated by their mothers in divorces and are saying no thank you to that possibility. They know the attractiveness of a 35 year old single woman as a future mother and homemaker and are saying…”I don’t think so.” They know there is a “wall” that hits the women for child bearing. No family means no marriage.

These young men see single 35 year old women as crazy cat ladies later in life.

Add it up and these are the fruits of 60+ years of feminism.

To be successful in marriage, IMHO, means doing the opposite of feminist thinking. Do so and the young suitors will notice you, ladies!

Chris G said (July 17, 2018):

The problem with men today is they keep pouring perfume on pigs. Yesterday I saw a great movie from 1954 - "7 Brides For 7 Brothers". It was common knowledge back then if you want a good wife she better be a virgin. A proper marriage is a blood contract with a hymen, just as circumcision is a blood contract with The Most High. Moses gave clear guidelines on finding a good wife; (Josephus Antiquities IV - 1:23 ) PICK A WOMAN WITH A "HYMEN" FROM A GOOD FAMILY WITH PARENTS THAT HAVE NEVER BEEN DIVORCED; So simple, yet how many foolish men,(me included) can ever say they've done that?! Men stop spoiling these strumpets and find real women of faith with their hymens intact!

Plus Henry you got to stop using this strange suicidal sounding word "self-sacrifice" and replace it with "compassion". The same can be said for men as well women, good people in general will show compassion. The Most High God is literally the Spirit of compassion.

Interestingly the Prophet Moses married outside his race twice with an Ethiopian(Tharbis) and a Midian(Zipporah).

JJ said (July 16, 2018):

A Muslim man once told me that he wanted to marry a virgin despite his promiscuity because women had more self-control. I reacted against that and have sought to disprove it. It has been hard and I'm still not there but one can reclaim male power without a woman (a big reality in the lives of many a man) not only by opening doors (for everyone) but by pushing the limits of our physical and mental capabilities.

In reality, men are stronger than women, can work longer hours, can handle more information, can think more logically etc. We have to have discipline though but when we exercise discipline, our testosterone levels can go up to higher levels and we can enjoy masculine sensations we never knew we had. And we have to aim at taking care of ourselves. Women are socialists by nature. Men can also be socialists out of laziness and lack of discipline.

Brendon O'Connell said (July 16, 2018):

They taught me useless algebra at school. I hated it and never used it and doubt I ever will.

I could have used your man woman lesson.

Stephen Coleman said (July 29, 2015):

You are 100% correct, Henry. The emotional causes of sexual impotence are directly related to feminism and the 4 Cs; complaining, controlling, criticizing and competing. Few men can remain potent with a woman that takes on his mother's role or a woman that insists on making her man into a woman.
Stephen Coleman

Peter said (July 28, 2015):

An excellent article upon a hidden problem that too many, men and women, want to deny exists. Women were not made equal, they were made as a helpmeet for the man. We see this in Genesis 2:18 - "And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him."

We see this expounded by St. Paul when he says in I Cor. 11:7 "For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. 8 For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; 9 for indeed man was not created for the woman's sake, but woman for the man's sake…."

Man is made in the image and likeness of God, and woman is made in the image of man for the purpose of reproduction and to care for him. To him is God's power and duty, and woman is to respect and love her husband and submit to him in all things.

St. Paul states in Ephesians 5: 23 "For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything."

Thus, as Henry notes a woman gains from submitting to male power, in its recognition and furtherance in their marriage and family.

Dan said (July 27, 2015):

This article takes me back. I remember applying the casual test that you explained in the roller girl incident, on an 'internet dating' date in 2003. It was in a restaurant. I merely asked "would you pass the salt please." She said, "you can reach it".

That saved me days, perhaps weeks of finding out the hard way.

Lee said (July 27, 2015):

The male-female relationship as you describe it, power/respect vs love/trust,

Is also the same dynamic of the relationship God wants to have with people - minus the sex aspect of course.

The parent child dynamic is the same thing, minus the sex aspect, again, of course. Which is why it works the same way for God as our parent and us as His children.

P said (July 27, 2015):

Henry, just want to say that God brought me the right woman; and just as you wrote, virtually frictionless; and that it IS possible to have a deep true intimate relationship that compliments one another without the power struggle.

Takes faith on her part, ( and ours), and thus far have had the most amazing relationship in my life. I hope other guys and gals can also experience this, knowing how to solve any friction amongst themselves, in love.

Paul said (July 27, 2015):

As a man who has struggled much with gender confusion and gender roles due to sexual abuse endured at the hands of a woman for years and years, it is refreshing to know that there is even scientific evidence to show that women are different from men and that it is okay for me to be a man in this hostile world. When women want equality with men outside of the bedroom, men will have equality with women inside of the bedroom. Neither of these equalities is good for any species and especially the human species.

Michael said (July 9, 2013):

A wonderful article, Henry. Well done. My (second) wife and I have a correct balance in our relationship. She acknowledges me as commander and chief, without rancor. I treat her with love and respect, always, and she in turn gives me respect and adoration. So unlike my first wife, where she always had to control every damn thing of every damn day. In time, I felt neutered and discombobulated. She is a miserable person now (the mother of my son) and a hard cold emotionless automaton. Thank god that is over! Anyway, your message is courageous and please continue to propound it.

Scottie said (July 9, 2013):

We live in a manipulated culture that portrays heterosexual marriage as boring, out-of-fashion and un-cool, yet at the same time this culture of ours is embracing homosexual marriage as cool and hip. There's a war going on now against heterosexual institutions and marriage. Look at Hollywood and especially TV shows. Most men are portrayed as fat,stupid, ignorant and.uneducated, while the female is almost always shown in a domineering manner, bossing her husband around like a child..(everybody loves Raymond,.King of Queens etc...) As I have said countless times, the Illuminati are socially engineering us on a daily basis.

One way they are doing this is with the mass media. For example have you ever wondered why people refer to television shows as 'Programs' or 'local programming' ? Because it subconsciously programs us and molds our behavior. The Illuminati doesn't want strong healthy functional families.

The illuminati want us isolated, poor and dependent on the government.
They do not want wealthy established families. Marriage is nothing to be looked down upon, all power to the young people forming long lasting bonds and relationships.

JG said (July 8, 2013):

Through the course of my 60 years on this Earth I learned a lot of things too late in life.

God really does send us a woman to be a lifetime mate, "to have and to hold, for better and for worse, and in health and sickness". However, like myself, we don't recognize it when it is sent to us. And then we go on from one woman to another searching for what we once had and trying to find the same thing in another relationship. That one never works out well.

After we have that "meant to be" first true relationship with a woman and it is lost, our innocence is also lost with it and it can't be found again.

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at